OMG! Brains are not them.

More from Wierd News.

Be Afraid.

Be very Afraid.

Government in Action!

In May, the school board in Barrie, Ontario, notified Children's Aid Society to intervene with mother Colleen Leduc and her daughter Victoria, 11, because of suspected sexual abuse, angering the conscientious Leduc, who until that point had taken extraordinary measures to protect the girl, who is autistic. Upon investigation, it was revealed that the suspicion came from a teaching assistant who said her psychic had told her that a girl with a "V" in her name was being abused by a man aged 23 to 26. Leduc now refuses to trust Victoria to public schools because "they might want to take out a Ouija board or hold a seance." [National Post (Toronto), 6-19-08]

The June transfer of a prisoner from lockup to Britain's Northampton Crown Court, just across the street, required summoning the closest prison van (57 miles away) to come give him a ride. The prisoner (accused thief Mark Bailey) could not simply be walked across the street because officials feared that public, custodial exposure (a "perp walk") would embarrass him, in violation of his "human rights." [Daily Telegraph (London), 6-6-08]

The San Francisco Board of Supervisors has a longstanding policy of not co-operating with the federal government's enforcement of immigration laws, but in June that stance abruptly backfired, according to a San Francisco Chronicle report. Illegal immigrants who are minors and who committed felonies such as drug-trafficking in San Francisco have not been bound over for federal deportation but have either been quietly flown home, with an escort, at city expense, or placed in California group homes. In June, when San Bernardino County officials realized that one of its youth group homes contained drug dealers, San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom halted the program and promised the city would improve its relationship with immigration officials. [San Francisco Chronicle, 6-29-08; Los Angeles Times, 7-2-08]

Police Blotter

Police, including SWAT officers, were called to an apartment in Mesa, Ariz., in June after neighbors reported a fight between a man and woman that included yelling and breaking things inside. When they arrived, they found only a 21-year-old man, conducting the fight by himself, alternating a high-pitched voice with a low-pitched one. He was referred for a medical exam. [Arizona Republic, 7-1-08]

Need for Speed: Ontario's recent law against street-racing snared two noteworthy drivers in April: a 26-year-old man who was cited when he passed a marked police car while doing 178 km/hr (106 mph) and the driver of a garbage truck, racing at 112 km/hr (double the posted speed limit). [Canwest News Service (Toronto), 4-24-08]

A 3-year-old girl was seriously injured in Huntsville, Ala., in May in a collision caused, said witnesses, by a speeding contest between two men, both employees of Comcast Corp., driving company vans. [WAFF-TV (Huntsville), 5-13-08]

Questionable Judgments

In March, a jury acquitted the former parking manager for Fresno, Calif., Bob Madewell, of all misuse-of-funds charges, including one count for reducing the minor league baseball Grizzlies' parking fees in exchange for tickets for his brother and himself, and another count in which he paid a female worker $300 in city funds to let him touch her breasts. Juror Trish Riederer, in an interview with the Fresno Bee, said she and her fellow jurors believe that Madewell did everything that prosecutors say he did but that the city did not have clear procedures in place about Madewell's scope of authority. [Fresno Bee, 3-14-08]

Teachers Out of Control: Fifth-grade teacher Susan Romanyszyn, 45, was arrested in Bucks County, Pa., in January and charged with 17 counts of threatening bombings and gun violence after she was assigned to teach fourth grade, instead. [Bucks County Courier Times, 1-31-08]

Sixth-grade teacher Roshondra Sipp of Jackson, Miss., aroused parents' ire in May for forcing the class to vote on who among them would be most likely to die young or get pregnant while still in school or get HIV or go to jail. Then, Sipp posted the results, enraging parents whose little charmers made the lists. [Clarion-Ledger (Jackson), 5-15-08]